Friday, 27 August 2010

Starter For Ten

Blog reader 'Who?' has posed ten Worcester Park questions which you may (or may not) be able to help with:

1.Why have I never seen anyone killed at the junction of the High Street with Stone Place car park?

2. Why have I not yet been killed by the boy racer I am always convinced will finish me off when I'm just round the corner out of sight in the traffic queue at the bottom of the Avenue?

3. Does the lady behind the counter on the right in the High Street post office ever have a day off?

4.What is the powerful force pulling me towards the doughnuts in the bakers window when I've only gone to get a birthday card from Fowler's?

5. What are all the electronic geniuses in the TV clinic doing now?

6.Who on earth though Marks and Sparks could make a go of it at THAT location?

7. What on earth did they do to the Plough Green pond?

8. What is the bacteria count under the railway bridge beside the railway station?

9.Should I offer to carry the front of the pram for the lady going down the stairs to the street from the Epsom-bound side of the station or will she think I'm a chauvinist pig or a stalker?
(Too late someone else has done it and I feel a fool again...)

10.How could I live here for 30 years without discovering the wild meadows behind the Old Malden Church? 

26 COMMENTS (Add Yours Now!):

janet a said...

9. Offer to carry the pram, I always do. I also offer to carry old people's shopping and luggage for people. But then i'm a bit odd.

Commuter said...

11. Is the man who works in the station in the afternoon the most miserable person in the world?

Anonymous said...

9. DON'T EVER offer to carry the pram! (Unless you want to accused of being a child molesting pram thief, by a member of ‘the KT4 sisterhood’). By the way, your ill-advised use of the word ‘lady’ is enough to get you convicted of chauvinism!

Nichu said...

Regarding 8. - has anyone noticed the perfect white stripes that the pigeons work so hard on maintaining? They won't be there now as it has rained recently. I worry that people might mistake it for a zebra crossing, adding to the traffic issues in WP noted in questions 1 and 2 :)

Father Of Chops said...

5\. Filling in Plough Green Pond with old stock from Marks and Spencers

6\. Well, the people who had a better location idea took their secrets to their graves with them when they were killed at the junction of the High Street with Stone Place car park when you weren't looking.

Anonymous said...

1. luck - not judgement

Anonymous said...

3. That's the lovely Babs. : )

Pat L. said...

10. The 'secret' meadows are very ancient - learn more about them and St. John's on Saturday 11th September at 2.00pm. Heritage Open Days.

WHO said...

Thank you. Some more questions:

1.Why does that big fast truck always meet me on THAT sharp bend on Worcester Park Road?
2.What does it take to get that junction outside the Hogsmill pub right?
3.Why can’t that shop opposite the kebab shop spell Mediterranean?
4.How grotty does that old estate agents beside the butchers have to get before someone does something with it?
5.When will the Hamptons feel right in its skin and be somewhere to live rather than somewhere to have a garish sales board at the entrance?
6.Why does everyone on the redesigned New Malden roundabout look as though they are definitely going towards Worcester Park but then give me a fright when they continue on round?
7.Could there be a longer, more strangulated route to get to Tesco’s?
8.How much are those Tesco car washers paid?
9.Who is the guy who works his socks off in the morning to serve you quickly at the left-hand ticket window at WP station so you can catch your train?
10.Does no-one turning right from the Avenue know you have right of way when going straight across from the station?

Anonymous said...

Has RYANGATE ever made a profit ???

Anonymous said...

WHY DO YOU CONTINUE TO IGNORE QUESTIONS RE; CUPPAHOLICS CAFE. ALL WE WANT TO KNOW IS IT OPEN OR CLOSED????

Worcester Park said...

I'm afraid I can't tell you that. But the constantly closed shutters might provide a clue...

The Dutchman said...

Wow Anonymous. That's some serious Cuppaholic related rage.

*imagines someone sat behind computer desk, banging fists in frustration at lack of update*

BenjyP said...

In addition

1, Why did Cazbar actually shut down?
2, When is the Police Shop ever open and what does it sell?
3, Is there anywhere else in the SouthEast that has as comprehensive a range of unhealthy snacks and sweets as Costcutter?
4, Why did KFC refit itself so badly that the 5th customer in the queue has to wait outside?

Anonymous said...

Oh please keep helping with buggys down the stairs...it's a nightmare and actually puts me off using the train...the fear that I'll be stranded at the top!

Mick said...

Yeah, that Ryan Gate shop is a mystery, full of stock, loads of staff, no customers but with a massive turnover when it was up for sale last year.

Anonymous said...

Ryan Gate is great if you do any Middle Eastern cooking (or Indian for that matter). The butchery is fantastic and really cheap (providing you're not after the makings of a bacon sandwich). And the shawarmas and various starters are great. It should be busier. Make it so, people.

Mick said...

Thanks, I'll bear that in mind the next time I'm doing some Middle Eastern (or Indian for that matter) Cookery.

Wasn't the place up for sale, sold, closed, refitted, reopened, closed, and reopened by the original owners ?, very strange...

Mick said...

Cuppaholic is Open. Just knock 6 times on the shutters

Anonymous said...

Mick, that might be so. I'm going to read between the lines here and 'guess' you're being being sarcastic. It's up to you where you buy food, of course. You can mock places a bit different, or take advantage of them to your benefit. Up to you, I guess. Just a couple of examples: you can buy preserved lemons in Waitrose for £4 plus or in Ryan's Gate for less that £2, or I bought 9 lamb chops in there for six pound something. But if you'd rather worry about how people make a living, very strange...

Mick said...

No sarcasm here, thank you for your in depth preserved lemon & lamb chop knowledge of Ryan Gate.

Bob said...

6) I liked the Marks & Spencer, I'd go there rather than Waitrose if it was still open

WP Spur said...

The electronic geniuses are now retail advisors to Sir Phil Green, I know he'd appreciate their input on creating the ultimate shopping experience - Arcadia take note.

M&S in that location? At £173,000 pa even they'd struggle..

Bob said...

Who is 'Misk' and why does he/she seem determined to scrawl on every wall/garage door in Worcester Park?

Hettie said...

re 10. Clearly not. Many also don't know you have right of way when turning left out of the station towards the high street.

Time Gentlemen Please said...

"Why did the Cazbar shut down?"...

...Why look a gift horse in the mouth?

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