Saturday, 6 June 2009

Weather Or Not

It seems that everyone except for Waitrose knew that this weekend would be a total washout.

Had our favourite local supermarket kept an eye on the weather forecast they could have avoided stocking their barbecue food section full to the brim with summertime fare that they stood no chance of selling to a shivering rain-sodden Worcester Park.

Unsurprisingly there was some drastic discounting of the unsold BBQ foods at 6 PM today.

I arrived just in time to witness the polite middle-class vultures descending. Scenting a meaty bargain they flocked on mass around the young lad with the pricing gun. No sooner had a packet of chicken and haloumi skewers been discounted than the prey was snatched from the hand of the assistant by the encircling manicured talons.

Some were hunting in packs, squawking speculation over how much they could horde in their freezers, and how many coconut salmon kebabs their awaiting brood could devour.

I approached to get a bargain myself, but the vultures had strategically positioned their trolleys to block the advances of other predators and shot warning glances at any who dared approach.

Eventually I spotted a gap in the blood-thirsty throng and made my advance on a packet of balsamic and mint marinated lamb shoulder chops.

Quite a bargain at only 89 pence.